Ha! And you thought I'd gone back to smoking!

What?  You had guessed that I was feeling so pathetically sorry for myself that I couldn't post?  Ok, that's about right.

Anyway, for today, here is my new perspective on time-honored sayings:

• Today is the first day of the rest of your life -- WITHOUT SMOKING
• A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush -- UNLESS THE ONES IN THE BUSH HAVE SMOKES
• All we have to fear is fear itself -- EXCEPT FOR FEAR OF NEVER SMOKING AGAIN
• Welcome to the Hotel California -- WHERE WE TAX SMOKES SO MUCH THAT IT RUNS ABOUT $400 A FUCKING PUFF
• Puff the Magic Dragon, lives by the sea -- AND SMOKES ALL HE WANTS BECAUSE HE"S FUCKING MAGIC AND CAN GET HIS FAT ASS OFFSHORE FAST ENOUGH TO ESCAPE THE GODDAMN PC POLICE

Ok, you get the idea.  I'm doing better, but still rather bitter.

Posted by: Hermit Dave at 09:26 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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